Astrology for Fun

A friend sent this to me in one of those amateur html formatted emails.  These are often embedded with malware.  The message was a chain letter, to boot! 

Therefore, I stripped most of the html and pasted it into a cleanser program.  Some of these descriptions made me giggle.  I am a Sagittarian with Aquarius ascending and moon in Scorpio…fire, air, and water, mutable, for what it’s worth. My sweetie is a Scorpio with Aquarius ascending and moon in Cancer…water and air, fixed, for what it’s worth. I just want to know why Saggies are only worth 6 years of good luck, while Capricorns are worth 20 years!  *giggle* ~Liv

CAPRICORN -The Go-Getter (Dec 22 - Jan 19 )  Patient and wise. Practical and rigid.. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorn's tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want. 20 years of good luck if you forward.
AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18 )  Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality.. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality. 11 years of luck if you forward.
PISCES  - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20 ) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative. May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Doesn't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish... Good kisser. Beautiful. 8 years of good luck if you forward.
ARIES  -  The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19 ) Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish.. Short fuse. (Easily angered.) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit.. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic. 6 years of good luck if you forward..
TAURUS  - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20 )  Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind.. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous. 12 years of good Luck if you forward
GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20 ) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable but needs to express themselves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips . May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally. 5 years of good luck if you forward.
CANCER  - The Protector (June 21 - July 22 ) Moody, emotional. May be shy.. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life.. Protective.. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic. 16 years of good luck if you forward.
LEO  - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22 )  Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries.. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.. 13 years of good luck if you do forward.
VIRGO  - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22 )  Dominant in relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic. 7 years of good luck if you forward.
LIBRA  - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct 22)  Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Gives in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible. 9 years of good luck if you forward.
SCORPIO  - The Intense One (Oct 23 - Nov 21 ) Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hard-working. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive.. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and emotional. 4 years of good luck if you forward.
SAGITTARIUS  -The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21 )Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self . Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious... Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out. 6 years of good luck if you do forward..